Fear of God (Trials of Strength Book 1) (10 page)

‘
So they let
you go?’ I said.

‘
Yeah,’ Chris
replied. ‘For them, murdering my wife wasn’t good enough. Killing
me would be too easy, so they released me into this nightmare
instead. They only had to keep me locked up until their plan came
into action, then it wouldn’t matter what I did.’

‘
What do we do
now?’ Anna asked.

Before Chris could
answer, footsteps echoed from the hallway outside. Our heads
together snapped to the door. Chris and Anna bolted up, guns ready.
I slid Claire to the floor, whispered goodbye, and moved behind
Anna. I felt small without a weapon, no matter how much I’d
preferred not to use one. Chris wrapped his hand around the handle
and waited for the steps to get closer before he wrenched the door
open.

A woman
screamed and smacked Chris across the head. I waited for the guns
to fire, but it never came. I looked around Anna. A woman stood in
the doorway, eyes wide and hands balled into fists. She didn’t look
like one of
them
,
and Anna and Chris lowered their weapons. Chris rubbed furiously at
where she had slapped him and Anna chuckled. The woman looked to be
in her mid-thirties, she had smooth skin, but the faint lines of
age were growing. Her black hair was loose and messy, and her
navy-blue eyes darted between us.

‘
Oh thank
god,’ she sighed. ‘You’re not going to kill me are you?’

I shook my head,
numb.

‘
No,’ Chris
gasped. ‘Not unless you try hitting me again.’

‘
Sorry,’ she
grimaced.

‘
Who are you?’
Anna asked almost bouncing on her feet.

I realised that it was
the first person we’d run into that wasn’t changed. That meant
others might not have. That meant hope. In spite of everything, I
felt myself smile.

My family
might still be okay.

‘
Jane
McDonald,’ she said, ‘and boy, am I glad to see you
guys.’

Before anyone could say
anything else, Chris interrupted, ‘Not to break this wonderful
conversation, but we’ve given up enough noise to be heard for miles
over. It’s time to go.’

‘
Somewhere
safe?’ Jane asked with wide eyes, surprised.

‘
Relatively,’
I shrugged as she frowned.

Chris looked at us,
narrowed his eyes, and we fell silent. We headed back through town
as the sun set. The air grew colder and we walked with our gazes
darting back and forth. The tension was palpable, and no one
uttered a word until we had reached the hole we’d come up
through.

That’s when another
thought struck me. It hadn’t really registered before, but once we
were back underground I pondered it. Before we had started running,
we’d left the way topside open, but when the car alarm sounded, we
came out to it closed. I walked beside Chris and relayed my
thoughts to him.

‘
Hasn’t it
dawned on you yet?’ he asked, not too harshly. ‘There’s someone
down here who isn’t one of us, in the group. They’re one of
them.’

I knew he didn’t mean the
insane creatures.

*

Once we got back to the
group, Chris brought everyone around him. Paul and Terry eyed me
suspiciously, and Anna eyed them both back with a growl. I couldn’t
help but smile, which probably didn’t improve their opinion of me.
As soon as we had come back Anna asked Terry to check me over. He
had sighed at my stitches which had broken a little, and cleaned
and fixed the wounds, wrapping fresh bandages around them. He
muttered how we didn’t have an infinite supply of them, and told me
to drink water in sips. My throat was bruised, but would heal.
There was nothing he could do for my broken nose, and he looked
pleased I would have to suffer the pain.

Chris nodded at us and we
knew what he was about to do. He was going to tell them, tell them
what he told us, and it wouldn’t be pretty. He sped through his
story, no one interrupted. Everyone was shocked when he finished
and couldn’t utter a word. Chris kept his composure, he’d shed
enough tears, and it was time to let it go. Paul’s mouth was a
gaping mess coupled with his permanent scowl, and Terry looked
faint.

‘
You?’ Terry
trembled. ‘
You
did
this?’

Chris shook
his head, but Terry continued, ‘
You
killed my family.’

He pounced. Paul caught
him before he reached Chris and held him still. I had never seen
the rage Terry had, it aged him years and he looked ready to kill.
Paul mirrored that, his eyes wide. Jane was beside us and she
looked oddly detached, but no one could say anything. The group as
a whole never questioned their saviour, but then everything had
been destroyed, and they were left with only reality. A few
cried.

‘
Now, now
Children,’ a voice came from behind the group.

‘
Shit,’ Jane
muttered under her breath.

I looked over to her and
she shook her head. A large woman made her way through the group
and positioned herself next to Chris. Her skin was a dark mocha
colour and she looked like she was approaching her fifties. Her
light brown hair sprung out in curls and her pale blue eyes looked
into your soul. A few people groaned, but I had no idea why until
she spoke again.

‘
Do not blame
this man. I sense he tells the truth and should be forgiven for has
he not brought us to salvation?’ she said gently to the people
around her. ‘Now, I would hope you will listen to me. For now we
know this enemy is human, let us break into the light, let us
reason with these creatures for our lives, let us beg of them
forgiveness hmmm?’

I could only stare at
her. What? Really? I understood rejecting reality, but this was
something else entirely. She was serious, and looked to be of sound
mind, well, in control of her senses.

‘
Grace,
honey?’ Jane chimed. ‘Sit down and shut up would you?’

‘
Ahhh, Jane,’
Grace said, her voice dripped with false delight. ‘It’s wonderful
to see you again, how, hmmm, fortunate, you weren’t
killed.’

Grace smiled.

Jane laughed. ‘Fuck
you.’

‘
Enough,’ Anna
waded into the middle. ‘It took a lot to tell us all this. But now
is not the time to fall apart. If we turn on each other, not only
are we screwed, but then we’re no better than those things up top.
Chris
saved
us. He
didn’t have to but he did.’

A few people nodded and I
smiled. A few hours ago she looked at Chris with suspicion, and now
she backed his corner. I admired her compassion and strength, and
wished I had some of my own. After a while, we passed around some
of the food and water we’d collected and I turned to
Jane.

‘
So what’s the
deal with you and this Grace?’ I asked, shivering slightly at the
latter woman’s smile.

Jane laughed, ‘Don’t
worry sweetie, she’s harmless. Just before this all happened she
was known to be a bit, well, you know, crazy.’

‘
Crazy how?’ I
said.

‘
Well, Miss
Fletcher was notoriously known for talking to plants. Once I was
walking by her house, I stepped on a flower that had grown out from
her garden,’ she chuckled again, and the sound was soothing. ‘Well
you see how that ended. She said she would curse me and that I was
the spawn of hell. There are more things, but by the looks of it,
you’d rather not hear them.’

I shook my head and she
laughed again. I made my way over to Anna and sat cross-legged in
front of her.

‘
You okay?’ I
asked.

‘
Am I okay?’
she smiled. ‘What about you? You’re the one who got
shot.’

‘
You’re the
one who just had their arm dislocated and, um, relocated?’ I said,
not sure whether that was the proper term.

She smiled again, and
moved her arm slowly. ‘It’s alright. A bit stiff, but
otherwise.’

We sat in silence for a
few minutes, and it was relaxing, both of us needed a while with
our thoughts before we could speak.

‘
So, do you
trust Chris now?’ I said.

‘
No,’ she
replied honestly. ‘But I’m glad we know. Plus, we can’t usurp him
from the leadership role. He’s better at it than anyone here. Or do
you think Paul would be a good fit?’

‘
You’re
right,’ I laughed. ‘Hey, what’s the deal with you and Paul? You
seem to know one another, albeit in an angry sort of
way.’

She eyed me
carefully.

‘
I dated his
son,’ she sighed and blushed. ‘Not long, and not well, and don’t
judge.’

‘
What?’ I said
as my eyes widened. ‘I wouldn’t judge you. I would if it was
serious. None of them seem the relationship type, and yeah, I guess
I just judged.’

She punched my
arm.

‘
I never said
it was smart,’ she said. ‘It wasn’t for long, and we didn’t
do
anything.’

I wrinkled my nose and
laughed. After a while she joined in.

‘
Thanks,’ she
whispered when we’d stopped.

‘
For what?’ I
asked.

‘
For cheering
me up,’ she replied. ‘You’re about the only person I trust around
here.’

I nodded, I felt the
same.

‘
It’s me that
should be thanking you, Anna,’ I said. ‘Without you I’d be hung,
drawn and quartered by now. I’m not even talking about what’s on
the streets. I have no idea what would have happened if you hadn’t
been here.’

‘
You would
have survived,’ she said, but I shook my head and she put her hand
on my arm. ‘Yes, you would have. I know it. I admire you, Lucas.
You kept your humanity even after all this started. The rest of us
couldn’t wait to chuck it away, we just wanted to
survive.’

‘
I don’t know
how long I can keep it up,’ I whispered, trusting her. ‘I’m scared
of exactly what you’ve just said. What will we have to give up to
last and get out,
if
we get out? Will it matter if we escape, if we become worse
than what we’re hiding from by our own choice? I can’t stand the
guilt anymore.’

‘
No,’ she said
gently. ‘You shouldn’t be guilty or blaming yourself. None of this
is your fault. I’m so sorry about Claire.’

I looked away, tried to
keep the tears from my eyes. Anna bent over and wrapped her arms
around me. I did the same, and we sat there, accepting our grief
and guilt. Realising the want to survive versus what we were
capable of to achieve it. We clutched each other, and tried to let
it all go.

The
Doctor

I wished I’d never need
sleep again, but after a while I drifted off. I was back in that
chair, bolted to the ground, restrained in a room empty of hope and
full of blood. I waited for them, the strange men, the fire. I
waited for the agonising ring and the woman’s chipper but cold
inducing voice. I waited for the faces of the dead to haunt me, but
none of them came. The light above cut off and I was plunged into
darkness.

I could hear them, voices
whispering from around me, through the black mass.

FOG.
They screamed.

Aim.
Shoot,
Chris repeated.
It’s you or them, and you have to get that, or you’ll
die.

Hope,
Anna whispered.
Someone
made sure, Lucas, that their shots wouldn’t kill you.

Don’t worry,
Subject 17, I’ll be looking out for you. Make me proud,
a stranger’s voice said through the
darkness.

*

I woke with the last
voice echoing through my mind. I’d forgotten about that moment
after being attacked the first time, but the man’s voice rung loud
and clear and fresh questions burst into my mind. Anna was already
awake, and part of me wanted to tell her what had happened, but the
other part of me was too afraid. She trusted me, and I her, but if
I told her what some man might have said, what if she turned on me?
One look at her face and all thoughts vanished.

‘
What’s
wrong?’ I asked.

She clenched and
unclenched her fists, her eyes narrowed and her nostrils
flared.

‘
The group,’
she said, ‘they want someone else to lead us. They don’t trust
Chris, and now they’ve had time to chew over what he told them,
they’re panicking. Plus, guess what? Paul’s leading a campaign for
himself, and he’s gained some followers.’

I hadn’t realised the
ruckus. Chris and Paul stood inches apart, both red with rage. A
few people had chosen Chris’s side, but the majority had taken a
place beside Paul. They were discussing what they should do with
Chris. I even heard the word kill. A shiver ran up my spine and I
had to breathe deeply to stop the bile at the back of my
throat.

Anna’s face was flushed,
as if she’d tried to wade into the argument, but had gotten knocked
back out. She confirmed as much.

‘
Paul and
Chris won’t let me get any say in, sexist bastards,’ she spat. ‘I
understand what Chris has been through, and Paul. But this can’t
happen. I’m sitting here watching us fall apart and there’s nothing
I can do. With Paul leading this group, how long do you think we’ll
last?’