The Lake (The Lake Trilogy, Book 1) (23 page)

I see it now more clearly than I had before. The old and the new
aren’t
mutually exclusive. What Will and I do is make each other better. Without Will I’m just an old shirt, but I’m done being just an old shirt.

I stand in the shower for a while after I’m technically done, lost in thought. Knowing what happened to Marcus’ family, I know what I need to do. I can‘t let Gregory Meyer destroy Luke and Claire
. I can’t let him infiltrate the only family I have left. I will do whatever I have to do to protect the ones I love. Whatever the game Gregory Meyer wants to play, not only can I play it, I can beat him at it.

I get ready for bed and decide to watch a movie instead of my normal reading. Tonight I need something mindless to help me wind down. Luke and Claire are in the loft already watching something I’ve never seen before and I join them.

It feels good just being in the same room as them. It’s impossible to be around them and not feel how much they love me. The smallest glance, the way Claire pats the side of my leg as I pass her on the couch…gestures that make my heart warm with love and acceptance. It’s been a long time since I’ve felt that. It’s the kind of love that is willing to move mountains for you. The kind of love that is willing to stick around even when they don’t agree with your decision, just so they can pick up any pieces that might fall. It’s been a long time since I’ve felt that unconditional love.

I know that
somewhere, deep down Gram loved me, but her love came with strings attached. It didn’t take long after hearing phrases like, “I’m doing this as a favor to you,” and “That’s ok, it’s just one of the most important things in my life” before I cut myself off from my own feelings and surrendered to making up for how I had broken her heart. My job was to make her happy. Period. It wasn’t hard because I really loved both Gram and Gramps, and I know I owed them. I just wish I hadn’t owed them so much.

I climb in bed and pull the covers up to my chin, satisfied that the movie did its job. Will is going to be over in the morning and my first objective is to find out how he’s doing. I’ve been troubled since we left him standing in his driveway deep in his own concern. For now, I’ll sleep well knowing that I’m going to do whatever I need to do to protect everyone from Gregory Meyer’s wrath, whatever that looks like.

I’m in my usual spot in the loft staring out the window trying my best not to be shaken by Will’s worry. I’m jostled from my stare when I hear someone coming up the stairs and turn to see Will standing at the railing looking solemn.

“Hey,” I say to him. “You’re here earlier than I was expecting.”

“We need to talk.” Will approaches me at the window and takes my hand and leads me to our place by the lake. With every
swift and silent step I search for reasons for Will’s despair. I run through scenarios of backlash from his father ranging from childish time-outs to death threats.

“Will, are you ok? Did something happen?” I ask.

“Yes,” he says.

“What happened?” My stomach begins to churn as my mind exaggerates scenarios that terrify me. Has his father already begun to wage threats against me, or worse, Luke and Claire? Or have the threats been directly aimed at Will? What more could he do to Will that he hasn’t already done?

“What happened is…I fell completely and helplessly in love with you.” Will is focused and determined, but rattled.

“What’s going on, Will?” As much as I want to, this isn’t a moment to respond sweetly to his profession of love. Something has happened and my gut tells me it isn’t good.

“Watching you drive away the other night… The idea of you leaving forever is the most terrifying thought.” He rakes his fingers through his hair and breathes a heavy sigh. “I have an idea, and I just want you to hear me out, ok?” I nod and wait for him to speak. When he does, he blurts out the last words I expected to hear from him. “Run away with me. We can go…away…down to Florida maybe. There’s an account that I have access to. I can drain it and we’ll be gone before anyone ever knows. We can live off the cash so he won’t be able to track us. We don’t have to live like this, Layla. We don’t have to live in fear.”

I want to tell him that nothing would make me happier than to leave everything behind and follow him to the ends of the earth
, but I can’t do that. I just got Luke and Claire and they just got me. It would break their hearts, and mine, if I left them. I can’t shake the knowledge that running away would only trap us in this prison of hiding forever.

“Will, as romantic as running away with you sounds, it’s just not realistic.”

“Layla, if he finds out…” Will is distraught. He puts his hands on his head and begins to pace. “This isn’t like other times I dated girls he didn’t approve of just to piss him off. With the exception of Holly, I didn’t care what happened to any of those other girls. He could say or do whatever he wanted because I didn’t have feelings for them. You’re different, Layla, and he knows it. I won’t let him take you away from me. I’m not going to let him destroy us.” He stares at me, waiting for my response. This is the most nervous I’ve ever seen him.

“Will, this isn’t only about me. You may be trying to protect me, but I want to do whatever I can to protect you, too.” I reach up and rest my hand on his cheek. Looking into his eyes I see everything that I’ve been waiting for. The whole of my future lies in the depths of these ocean blue eyes. “If your father knows we’re together he’s going to make your life a living hell. I want to be with you. I already made it perfectly clear that I’m willing to do whatever I have to do not to lose you. I can do this. Please.”

“Layla, love, I’m not concerned about me. I would take a thousand of my father’s tongue-lashings, sanctions, and acts of retaliation before I let him do anything to hurt you,” Will says caressing my cheek with his thumb. “I have spent every minute since dinner with them going back and forth between what is the
best
thing and what seems like the
cowardly
thing.  Part of me feels like not giving him reason to come after us is best because then he wouldn’t have what his twisted mind would consider cause. The other part of me wonders what kind of man am I not to stand up and tell my father that I’m in love with you, regardless of what the fallout might be?” This visibly disturbs him. I hate seeing him having lost his confidence.

I take Will by the shoulders and look up into his eyes with as much intensity as I can assemble. “What kind of man are you? You’re a man who is willing to risk everything for someone like me. You’re a man whose passion is leading him straight into greatness. You’re the best man I know.” Will throws his arms around me and holds me closer to him than I thought was possible. “We cannot make everything about your father. If we do, then
that’s
what will destroy us…and then he wins anyway.”

Will’s breathing eases and he pulls back to look at me. “How did you do that?”

“Do what?”

“Talk me down off the ledge. I have a suitcase packed in the car. I was ready to leave, Layla. I’d still go if you changed your mind.”

“I’m too logical sometimes. Trust me – I want to pack a bag, too, but we would never be free, Will. We’d constantly be running. I don’t want to do that. At least we have this place. We have someplace where we don’t have to hide. Someone once told me that we should make the most out of our time together. Let’s just do that.”

Will holds me in his arms for a long time and whispers “I love you” to me over and over again. I rest my head on his chest, blanketed by his strong arms. I will never tire of hearing those words from him, and hope he never stops saying them.

“How do you feel about doing a lot of nothing with me today?” he asks sweetly.

“I would love to do nothing with you,” I answer. I pull my head from his chest and kiss his chin without thinking. It’s the first time I’ve initiated any physical touch with him like that. He doesn’t flinch but tilts his face to mine and kisses me.

Will and I spend the day in the loft in the perfect do nothing afternoon. We choose books at random from the wall and read. Will creates a game where we each pick an excerpt and try to carry the dialogue between the two books. It’s like a sophisticated version of MadLibs, but even more hilarious because we’re reading from
The Wizard of Oz
and
Gone with the Wind
. Visualizing Rhett Butler and the Lollypop Guild together has me laughing so hard I’m crying.

We talk and watch movies and nap on the oversized couch. It’s just the right size for us to lie next to each other, me cradled in Will’s arms, my head nestled into his chest. This has officially become my absolute favorite place to be.

“What’s it like?” I ask as we lay together, our breathing synchronized.

“What’s what like?” he replies.

“What’s it like being so rich?”

“Really? You have free reign to ask me anything in the world and
that’s
what you want to know?”  His tone is humored chastisement.

“Seriously! I’ve never been wealthy, or known anyone who was. I just wondered what it was like. I mean, why do some people love it and others hate it?” I’ve always thought this was an interesting phenomenon, and there is definitely a polarized dichotomy on the subject at Heyward, even if it is among only a few.

“First, let’s get one thing straight: my
father
is wealthy, I have nothing. He gives me money because he thinks it solves everything.” He pauses and thinks a moment before answering. “I guess
I
hate it because I see what it does to people. I see what it did to my mom.

“
I remember being little, like six, and she would take me places, play with me. She was a regular mom. She wore jeans and t-shirts, but dressed up when she needed to. She was always so beautiful. But…then…it was weird.” Will’s voice stumbles and I can tell this is difficult, even painful, for him to talk about. “She literally changed overnight. I remember having been at the park all day with her one day, and the next day the jeans were in the trash and she was interviewing nannies.” His head rests heavier on the cushion above my head, his whole body heavy with the sad emotions this recollection conjures. “It wasn’t the money that got to her. I mean she wasn’t scared of being poor. She came from a blue collar, working class family that had to scrimp and save for even the smallest luxuries in life. It was the power that my dad wielded with it. I didn’t understand then, but I know now that he was unyielding and relentless.”

“I don’t understand. Why would your dad choose your mom, having come from the class he hates so much?”

“She was beautiful. She
is
beautiful. My dad saw her and wanted her. Gregory Meyer gets what Gregory Meyer wants, remember?” Will answers with sadness saturating each word. “So, he groomed her into the woman he wanted her to be. He changed what she wore, what she ate, what type of music she listened to; he showered her with money and taught her how to live the life that he wanted her accustomed to.”

I can see that it’s hard for him to talk about his mom. He doesn’t want to paint her in a negative light and I understand what that feels like. A memory from my own childhood floods my mind and before I know it I’m sharing every detail I can remember.

“My parents were big activists. I called them my little hippies. Before one cause had run its course they were doing research on the next up and coming one. They were passionate, sometimes a little too much, about their causes.

“
I was eight when my parents got involved with a group that was protesting Taiwanese sweatshops. We drove down to Miami to a rally in front of some famous designer’s gated neighborhood. We had been there for a while and I was getting bored. I held a sign and chanted with them for a while, but I didn’t
really
understand what was going on. I’m pretty sure I was there for visual effect.  There weren’t any other kids there, not that it mattered. Half the time I think my parents forgot that
I
was kid.

“
I had brought a book with me but left it in the car. When I tried to find where we parked I got lost, and when I tried to find my way back, I got even more lost. I wandered around for over an hour before I found them. I had been gone almost two hours and they didn’t have a clue.

“I’ve never told anyone that. I never wanted anyone to think they weren’t good parents. Sometimes they made mistakes. Sometimes they were just doing what they thought was right.
Sometimes those two were one in the same.”

Without a word Will takes my face in his hand and kisses me. I’m prepared for the bliss to end as quickly as it started, but it doesn’t. Will becomes more passionate, pulling me tighter to him. His hand moves down my back to my hip and down my leg to the back of my knee. He pulls my leg up to his hip and I feel his hand on the back of my thigh. I reach my hand under his shirt and feet his bare chest. His skin is hot and smooth. I move my hand to his back and pull myself even closer to him. With every second that passes Will is kissing me harder and with more passion than I knew was humanly possible. He lifts my shirt and I feel his hand on the skin of my back. I want him more than I ever thought one person could want another. My heart is beating fast and hard, and my breathing is labored in the exhaustion our passion is producing. My body is hot and I’m filled with elation.