The Big Chihuahua (5 page)

She looked startled. She glanced left and then right to see if anyone was listening. “My name is Leaf.”

“Geri, she is frightened,” said Pepe. “You must reassure her or she will not speak to you.”

“What a pretty name,” I said. “I’m hoping that Dogawanda will bless me with a beautiful name like yours.”

“Yes, I was lucky,” she said. She leaned in closer. “Crystal’s top aide is named Artichoke. Can you imagine?”

“They are all named after fruits and vegetables?” Pepe asked me.

“I guess so,” I told him.

“They better not try to name me after a plant or vegetable,” said Pepe. “Though come to think of it, I would not mind being called Towering Cedar.”

“What a cute little dog,” said Tammy, gazing down at Pepe with sad eyes. “He reminds me of my little girl, Fuzzy. I miss her so much.”

“Weren’t you allowed to bring a dog with you?” I asked.

“Oh no,” she said. “We give up everything that ties us to our mundane lives.”

I almost dropped my plate. “I would never give up my dog!” I said.

She gave me a sad smile. “I thought the same when I first came here, but when the wisdom of Dogawanda permeates your spirit, you stop missing those things you previously used to fill up the holes in your spirit.”

“I do not fill up the holes in your spirit,” Pepe said to me.

Tammy was still gazing longingly at Pepe.

“Would you like to join us for dinner?” I asked.

“I must get permission from my alpha,” she said.

“Alpha?”

“That’s what we call the leader of our pack,” she said, and scurried off.

Pepe and I found a place to sit at a round picnic table out on the redwood deck in back of the main lodge. There was a pleasant view of a little lawn sloping down to the edge of the woods. Huge boulders reared up out of the earth and tall firs and pines left a litter of needles underneath them. The sun was shining, but a light breeze kept the temperature comfortable.

I cut up the beef into small bites and set them down on the wood of the deck.

“Geri, do you expect me to eat off the ground?” Pepe asked.

“Like a wild dog,” I said. “Think Paleolithic!”

He thought about that for a minute, then attacked the beef, shaking it back and forth in his teeth as if he had just made a fresh kill.

“Nice work!” I said.

Leaf slid onto the bench across from me with a plate of her own, heaped with vegetables and a slice of beef.

“Flicker gave me permission to talk with you,” she said. “She hopes that my faith will help light your way along the path of Dogawanda.”

“Flicker?” I still couldn’t get used to the weird names.

“That’s my alpha. She is one of the inner circle, Star’s most trusted assistants. I am so lucky to be part of her pack.”

“Tell me about your life,” I said. “What did you do before?”

“There is no before,” she said. “There is only now.”

“Oh, I meant, what did you do in the past?”

“There is no past. Only the present,” she replied.

Hmmm. This was going to be difficult. “What do you do to make a living?” I asked. To give her an example, I added, “I stage houses.” That wasn’t totally a lie since that was what I did before working for Jimmy G.

“There is no need to make a living. All is provided for us. We have food and pure water. The sun and the stars and the wind bringing scents to delight our noses. The abuse and dissent of the world dissolve here. Wisdom and harmony abound.”

“Sounds like she is quoting something,” said Pepe.

“I’m sure it’s Dogawanda,” I said.

“All is Dogawanda,” said Tammy. She closed her eyes and recited, “‘The Now is like footprints in the sand. The tide washes in, and the tide washes out.’”

I decided it was time to deliver my message.

“Fuzzy stopped eating since you left. She is pining away for you.”

“What?” Tammy’s eyes opened wide.

“Fuzzy. She misses you!”

She stood up abruptly. “How do you know about Fuzzy?”

“Your husband, Mark, hired us to find you. He wants you to come home.”

She looked at her plate with a furrowed brow, then pushed it away from her. Again she looked to one side and then the other, as if she thought someone would listen in on our conversation. But the nearest diners were a few yards away.

“You don’t understand. I can’t leave,” she whispered.

“You mean they are holding you prisoner?” I asked, aghast.

“No.” She glanced around again. “It’s just that no one can leave without finishing the levels. Dogawanda says that once you have opened your mind, you cannot go back into the mundane world. The negativity there will overwhelm you. Only if you pass the fourth level can you reenter the world. Like Fox Black.”

“Fox Black is a level four?” I asked.

“Geri, focus!” said Pepe. “We are not here to meet an idol from your past but to deliver a message. And I would like some more of that beef, please.”

“Can I have some of the beef on your plate?” I asked Tammy. “Pepe is still hungry.”

“His name is Pepe?”

“You can call me Towering Cedar,” he said, jumping up on the bench.

“Sometimes he goes by Towering Cedar,” I said.

“Yes, Fox Black has been through all the levels. He is one of the very few who can go back out into the world. But you see how it affects him. He must come back here after every tour to reassemble the atoms that have been scrambled by his contact with those who still live in the darkness.”

“Ha!” said Pepe.

“What did Mark want you to tell me?” Tammy asked.

“He said he missed you,” I said. Although come to think of it, he never actually said those words.

“That’s odd,” she said. “I would think he’d be more concerned about the money.”

“Well, yes, he did mention that,” I said. “He was upset about the twenty-five grand. He said he had closed all your other joint accounts.”

Tammy looked horrified. “Oh no, that’s terrible! I just signed up for level three. I will be in so much trouble!” She jumped up and went dashing off, her braid swishing back and forth. I watched her disappear into the lodge, not realizing that would be the last time I would see her alive.

Pepe had polished off the last of the beef and was licking his lips. “I think I could get used to this Paleolithic diet,” he said.

I poked at the greens on my plate. I like salad but I still felt hungry. “I don’t think I can take any more of this,” I said. “And besides, we have delivered our message. I guess we can leave.”

“First, let us explore our surroundings,” said Pepe. “It has been a long time since I have had the pleasure of being in the wilderness. Let us commune with nature. Perhaps I can find a truffle for you.”

“A truffle? You mean those very expensive mushrooms that people use to garnish dishes in expensive restaurants?”

“
Sí
, the very thing. Only, Geri, they are not mushrooms. To be correct, they are fungus. I was trained as a truffle dog during my sojourn in the south of France.”

“You’ve got to be kidding,” I said.

“Au contraire,” he said. Once in awhile, he slips in some French. Just enough to make me wonder. “And I have heard there are truffles to be found in the Northwest woods. This is my first opportunity to explore for myself.” He dashed off toward an opening in the edge of the woods and I followed. Very quickly the day grew dim as the trees filtered the daylight.

“What are you doing?” I asked, following along behind him. He kept dashing off the path and pushing his nose through the loose pine needles.

“I’m sniffing for just the right spot,” he told me. He moved farther and farther away, slipping under bushes, going where I couldn’t follow.

“Pepe!” I called again. “Where are you?”

“Over here,” came his voice off to my left.

“I can’t see you!” I called out. “Come back!” I wish I had paid more attention when Felix was trying to teach me how to get him to come when he was called.

I hurried down the path, only to stop with a jolt. In front of me was a long narrow pen that stretched back into the woods. It was topped with the same razor wire I had seen at the front gate. There was a little hut at one end. The ground behind the fence had been cleared; it was just raw dirt.

“Pepe!” I called. I really didn’t like the look of it. Something in the atmosphere wasn’t right. I felt a prickle at the back of my neck.

“What is it, Geri?” said Pepe, hurrying to my side. I have to admit, he is very good at staying close when he thinks I am in trouble.

“Why would anybody build a pen here?” I asked my dog.

“I do not know,” said Pepe. “But there is a strong scent here.” He lifted his leg and put his own scent on the fence, then started to saunter back toward me.

Bam!
In a flash of snarling gray fur and slashing teeth and glowing yellow eyes, two wolves crashed into the chain-link fence, just inches from Pepe. They were long, rangy beasts, with wickedly sharp fangs.

Pepe jumped back, then turned to face them, his little lip lifted and a tiny growl emitting from his throat.

“Let’s get out of here, Pepe!” I said, bending down to scoop him up.

“Let me speak to them, Geri,” Pepe said. “Are they not my relatives?” He faced the pen and spoke to the wolves.

“I come to you in peace,” he said. “I am your cousin from the desert.”

The wolves seemed to understand him. They stopped their snarling and, unbelievably, lay down in front of my dog.

“There,” said Pepe, his tone very soothing, “that is more polite.” He said a few other things in Spanish, and the wolves nodded and whined like little puppies.

“Pepe,” I said, still feeling a bit nervous, “how did you do that?”

He turned to me and said proudly, “Elementary, my dear Sullivan. When a Chihuahua and a wolf go
perro a perro
, the best dog always wins.” He laughed and added, “
Seriamente
, though, I simply calmed them with my dulcimer voice. They knew I was not a threat, and they certainly knew
you
were no threat.”

I didn’t know if I should be insulted by that or not but felt it was high time to get away from there. Those wolves were obviously meant to guard the ranch, and I didn’t want to take any chances.

 

 

We were heading back to the room when one of the green-clad acolytes approached us. This time it was an older man with a salt-and-pepper beard and gold-rimmed glasses. He introduced himself as Flint.

“The enlightened one requests the honor of your company,” he said.

“What?”

“The enlightened one would like to speak to you,” he repeated.

“I think he means Dogawanda,” Pepe said.

“Do you mean Dogawanda?”

“Yes, he is very interested in your little companion,” Flint said, bowing in Pepe’s direction. “He wishes to converse with him on matters of great importance for the world. Would you follow me, please?”

I looked at Pepe, unsure of what to do.

“Finally,” said Pepe, trotting after the guy, his little tail wagging, “someone who wants to listen to me.”

Flint took us along a curving path that led behind the buildings and toward the yurt that stood in the center of the higher meadow at the far end of the property. It was about thirty feet tall and was constructed of hides draped over multiple wooden poles. From the open door one could see out across a valley of evergreens and up to the snow-capped peaks of the Cascade Range. Behind it was a fenced garden where I could see green-clad acolytes working among a tangle of plants and flowers growing in raised beds.

“You are very lucky,” Flint said. “The yurt is reserved for private sessions with Dogawanda. Usually you have to be a level four before you get a chance to meet with him one-on-one.”

“What level are you?” I asked. “How long does it take to get to level four?”

“I’m only a level three,” he said. “Very few make it to level four.”

“What would it take to get to level four?”

He shrugged. “It depends. Dogawanda decides when you are ready.”

“So how many people are at level four?” I asked, knowing already that Fox Black was a level four.

“Maybe seven of the people in the inner circle,” he said.

“The inner circle?”

“Star’s personal assistants. And a couple of celebrities who come here regularly, like Fox Black.”

Just as he was saying this, the flap that hung over the door lifted, and Fox Black appeared. He was wearing ripped jeans and a tight T-shirt on his skinny frame. His arms were covered with tattoos. He tossed back his long, dark hair as he emerged to get it out of his eyes and then stopped and stared at me and Pepe.

“So this is the lucky little fellow,” he said, looking over Pepe but also checking me out from head to toe and back again. He held out a hand. “Fox Black,” he said.

“I . . . I know,” I stammered, putting out my hand. “I’m a big fan.” Well, that certainly seemed lame. But he didn’t seem fazed. Must be used to women falling apart in his presence. This close up to him, it was easy to see the ravages of his lifestyle: the sunken cheekbones, the dark circles under his eyes, the unhealthy pallor of his skin. But he was still so sexy with those dark, piercing eyes and those thick, luscious lips....

Oh my God, he was bringing my hand up to his mouth. He was nibbling on the back of my hand with those big, sexy lips. I suddenly became light-headed. He smelled like incense and jasmine.

“Geri,” said Pepe. “Please exercise some self-control.”

Flint had gone ahead into the yurt. With one last long lingering look at Fox Black, I followed Pepe inside.

The interior was magnificent. All the poles that created the structure of the yurt curved up toward a central opening, perhaps twenty feet above our heads, which framed a view of the blue sky. Light filtered down, like a spotlight falling upon the tousled blond hair of Crystal Star, who was sprawled on a fur-draped platform in the center, wearing a magenta silk caftan trimmed with gold braid. The elderly Weimaraner slumbered by her side, his eyes closed. He was in a Sphinx-like position with his paws stretched out, and his head resting on them.

Flint bowed low in front of her, announced us as “Geri Sullivan and her Chihuahua, Pepe,” and backed out of the room.

“Have a seat,” said Star in a pretty, girlish voice. She waved her hand at a padded red-velvet bench that was in front of the platform. It was very low to the ground, so we had to look up at her. Pepe hopped up to sit by my side.

“Do you know,” I asked her, “that there are wild wolves in a pen in the woods?”

Star nodded. “Yes, someone gave them to me. Poor things. Wolf-dog hybrids. They were going to put them down, but I said we would take them and give them a safe place to live here. If anyone can teach them how to get along with humans, it is Dogawanda.”

Pepe gave a soft growl.

“Your little dog has a big heart,” said Star.

“It is true,” I said, my own heart suddenly swelling with love for my furry companion. He would protect me with his life. I knew that.

“Dogawanda is very interested in your companion,” she said. “He senses that he has much to say.”

“That is true,” I said. For some reason, I didn’t feel like elaborating on Pepe’s special talents.

“Dogawanda asked me to bring him here to ask him some questions. Will you permit that?”

I nodded.

She nodded as well. “I will now channel Dogawanda, who is inhabiting the body of Max.” She stroked the head of the Weimaraner. “Max is ready for retirement. At fourteen, he tires easily, but his indomitable spirit keeps him going. He has been serving as a vessel for Dogawanda for over eleven years. Even when he appears to be asleep, Dogawanda is present in him. The session will end when Dogawanda departs. Of course, I always record these sessions.” She reached out and tapped on a tape recorder that sat on a lacquered black table below the platform. I noticed her nails were painted gold. “With your permission, of course.” She didn’t wait for my assent. “That is the only way I will know what Dogawanda said.”

Star rested her gold-tipped fingers on the head of the slumbering Weimaraner, closed her eyes, and then began swaying gently back and forth. There was silence in the room. I could hear the Weimaraner snoring.

Pepe sneezed. I think the incense was bothering him.

“We should go, Geri,” said Pepe. “I do not like the smell of this.”

“Hold on a minute,” I said. “I just want to see what happens.”

Star’s eyes suddenly opened wide and she fixed her gaze on Pepe. “Towering Cedar,” she said to him, her voice husky, “I, Dogawanda, bid you welcome.”

Pepe was startled. “How did he . . . ?” he asked me. “I mean, how did
she
know my made-up name?”

“I didn’t tell her,” I said, as mystified as my dog. Then I remembered. “Maybe it was Tammy. I think I mentioned your name to her.”

“Why do you believe I learned your name from one of the human animals?” Dogawanda asked in a gruff voice. “Dogawanda knows the roots of the trees, the blue of the sky, the cry of the crows. Dogawanda knows all. That is how he knows you are Towering Cedar.”

“OK,” said Pepe, who seemed at a loss for words. Which was rare for him.

“You are the little dog who has come to teach us how to be big,” Dogawanda intoned. “Now tell me, Towering Cedar, what is the First Commandment of the Dog?”

“All roads lead to Dogawanda,” said Pepe. Dogawanda smiled. “Thus you know why you came hither. All the roads you have ever trod have brought you to me. You may well be the road that others follow to my enlightenment.”

“I am not a road,” said Pepe. “I am a Chihuahua.” He turned to me, puzzled. “It seems she can hear what I say.”

“It is I, Dogawanda, who hears you speak!” roared Dogawanda. “And do not forget that. As long as you are faithful to Dogawanda, I will raise you up to a position of power. Multitudes will come to listen to your wisdom. You will lead them down the road less traveled . . .”

“Is that not a line from Robert Frost?” Pepe asked me.

“. . . so by that road,” Dogawanda went on, “others will follow you as you have followed Dogawanda.”

“See, Geri,” Pepe said, “I told you that I was your fortune.”

Dogawanda turned his attention to me, or rather Star did, turning her golden eyes on me.

“You have been given a mighty trust,” she said, “a companion who is blessed with mighty powers, one who can channel the wisdom of the dog, who can inspire the adulation of the multitudes. But to be equal to his talents, you must rise up yourself. Dogawanda exhorts you to step firmly on the Way of the Dog. My vessel, Crystal Star, can teach you all that you need to know. Otherwise you will be swept off your path, as if by a tsunami.”

“Perhaps I should be called Tsunami,” said Pepe, sounding proud of himself. “No, I like Towering Cedar better.”

“Dogawanda must bid you adieu for now. But think carefully on what I have said. Your destiny is in your hands. And since it is always
now
, know that I am always with you until next we speak. Thus this is
aloha
, not good-bye.”

Star let out a gasp and went limp. She stayed slumped over for a long time. I was just thinking I might have to give her CPR when she lifted her head, her whole body quivering and shaking.

“Star, are you OK?” I asked, getting up and going over to her.

“I have never felt such a strong connection,” she told me, still shaking but looking radiant, almost beatific. “You will be attending the evening session, won’t you?”

“Well . . . ,” I started to say.

“We must stay, Geri,” Pepe told me. “We can drive back tomorrow. I want to hear more about what Dogawanda says that I say.”

“OK,” I said.

Star’s eyebrows went up. “That’s a good sign,” she said. “You show much aptitude. I think you would benefit immensely from the training we provide in level two. It teaches you how to think like a dog. You can register for it as soon as you complete the introductory session.”

“I can teach you how to think like a dog,” said Pepe, “and I will not charge you for it, either. Come to think of it, though, I could use a little extra spending money.”

Star came forward and held my hands. “You have a special gift, my dear. You must cultivate it.” She pressed a motherly kiss upon my forehead and gathered me into an embrace, which left me smelling like jasmine. “You are truly ready to begin your training, Dogawanda be praised!”