Talon (Ashes & Embers Book 4) (20 page)

I ignore Mikah. "Asia doesn't like to travel, so she didn't want to go anyway. I know it's something she was dreading when I told her I wanted her with me. And now she's got tons of orders for stage clothes and that soap stuff. So at least she has something to keep her busy."

"See? She'll be fine," Asher assures me. "Sometimes a little space is good."

"Ya know what's great about this?" Mikah says. "Now when we're on tour, I'll be the only one getting laid while you fuckers pine for your chicks and jerk off. All the hot chicks will be mine." He goes into a fit of hysterical laughter.

Asher shakes his head. "You're a fucking idiot, man. But while we're on the subject, if I catch any of you cheating on your girls, we're gonna have some serious issues. I know it's hard with the fans and the groupies throwing themselves at us sometimes, but trust me, it's not worth it. What you have at home is worth waiting for, so value it and appreciate it no matter what."

"Yoda has spoken yet again."

"Mikah, shut the fuck up!" Storm yells. "
Fuck
. You never stop."

"I have no problem killing him right now. Or cutting his tongue out. Just say the word," Vandal says with an evil grin. I have no doubt he would hurt Mikah in a heartbeat.

I sigh and puff on my e-cig, worried about leaving Asia alone so soon, and wondering how she's going to react when she finds out I'm leaving in two weeks. Grabbing my guitar, I silently pray this doesn't set us back again.

I
t's a pretty
awesome feeling to be able to look at someone and know that the smile they're wearing is because of you. It's an equally shitty feeling to know that you're the reason that smile disappeared.

"What? When?" She blinks at me like I'm speaking a foreign language.

"In about two weeks."

"You never said you had to leave so soon. I thought it was months away. Didn't you know about this before?"

"I did… I just forgot with everything else going on."

"How do you forget you're going on tour for almost three weeks? Isn't that a big deal?"

I shrug, not really sure how I forgot. "I dunno. I've been preoccupied with us and the house, I guess. I never really put a ton of thought into being on tour; I just go. I never had plans before or did anything other than play, so it didn't matter if I was gone."

"Well, it matters now." She storms out the back door and walks all the way to the edge of the landscaped backyard, where it turns into woods. I watch her from the window, afraid she might wander into the trees, but instead she sits on the ground.

Taking a deep breath, I go after her, slowly walking across the yard and sitting wordlessly next to her. She's holding a dandelion again, blowing the little seeds, just like she did our first day together. I've seen her doing it a few times since we moved here. Always after a fight.

"Why are you always blowing on dandelions?" I ask her, curiosity getting the best of me.

"I believe in them."

"You believe in that wish stuff?"

"It's not for wishes. It's said that the seeds carry thoughts and affections to a loved one."

I nod slowly as I watch the seeds get carried off by the wind and float into the woods. "And all those times you blew on one, who were you sending them to?"

"You, Talon. Only you."

Standing, I walk through the weeds into the edge of the woods and pick up the tiny seeds she just set free and gently put them in my pocket. At least the few that I can find.

"What are you doing?" she asks when I sit back down next to her.

"You think I want your love lying in the dirt?"

She shakes her head, her eyes dark. "It's just a stupid myth. I never I said I loved you." She gets up and goes back toward the house, obviously not wanting to be near me.

"Yeah, I know." I reply softly, but I'm too late, she's already too far away. For the first time, I wonder if her reluctance about sleeping with me wasn't only out of fear of me not loving her, but also of her not loving me.

Once again, I've fucked things up. This morning, everything was perfect. Like a fucking dream. And now she won't even let me sit next to her.

This is so much more work than I ever thought it would be. I never expected to be so high one minute and so low the next. I don't even know if this is normal for a relationship.

I could call Dr. Hollister, but I'm kind of worried that if this isn't normal, the team might say that they made a mistake and tell us to get divorced or something. I'm not ready to hear that.

Instead, I call Lukas because he's pretty much my best friend, and I know I can talk to him without him laughing at me.

"Hey," he says when he picks up.

"Is it normal to go up and down?"

"Dude, I'm gonna need a little more info about what you're talking about before I'm even going to attempt to answer that."

"Shit. Yeah. I mean in a relationship."

"Define up and down."

"Like we're happy, then something happens and we have a little fight and things are down again. Then we make up and it's better, but shit just starts all over. Like a fuckin' yo-yo."

He sighs into the phone. "Yes and no. No relationship is perfect, bro. There's always going to be little things you have to get over and work out. Gram told me that being married is the hardest job we'll ever have. It takes constant effort from both people to make it work, and I think that's true."

Fuck. That sounds hard. "That makes sense."

"You sound kinda messed up. Did you guys have a fight?"

"Sorta, not a bad one. This morning, everything was perfect. I mean, like, fucking great. Then when I got home, I told her I forgot about the tour, and now she's mad."

"You forgot?"

"Yeah. I just spaced it. You know how I get. I have, like, no sense of time."

"Well, that's true. Of course she's upset. She probably doesn't want you to go, and it sounds like you blindsided her."

"That's how it went down, pretty much. But, like, this sort of shit keeps happening. It's like there is always something knocking us back again."

He's quiet for a few moments before he starts talking again. "Let's not forget you guys are in a strange situation. You're still getting to know each other and understand each other. That's going to throw more curves at you than a regular marriage. You're, like, dating, but married."

"Yeah. It's like a never-ending blind date."

"Probably not that bad, but close."

"So, what do I do? Do you think we're just fucked?" I nudge a rock with my shoe, trying to picture going back to my life the way it was before. And I can't.

"No. You guys just hafta give it time, be patient with each other. And you need to spoil her a little, like I told you. No more shitty comments."

"I haven't been doing that anymore."

"How do you feel? How does she feel?"

"I dunno. I like her a lot. I've never felt like this before. And I kinda think she feels it too. I know she wants it, but then she seems scared of it, too. How do I know if I'm in love or not?"

"You know what I think? I think you're both falling in love, and you're both scared out of your fucking heads."

"Yeah…that could be. I don't think we were expecting this."

"Well, you shoulda been. You signed up to get married. What did you think was going to happen? What were you hoping for?"

I laugh into the phone. "I have no fucking idea. I just wanted to be happy with someone who wasn't a bitch or using me for something. At first, we were each hoping for a different type of person. But now we kinda seem perfect for each other. I don't get this up-and-down shit. I want it to stop and just be up."

"Good luck, man. That's not gonna happen. Hopefully, there'll be fewer downs, but they're always gonna happen. You hafta work through them together. Don't let it drag on, don't yell at each other, don't say nasty things. Just talk it over. That's the best advice I can give you if you want this to work. You both have to put the effort in to make it work and not let anything get in your way. And after that, if it's still not working out and the fights are constant, then you may have to throw in the towel. I know it sucks, but you can't live in misery."

I stare at all the dandelions growing on the edge of the yard. We still have a lot more to go through before they're all gone.

"Yeah, you're right. I guess we're both confused. I hope we can figure this shit out. We're a little over two months in already."

"Don't think about that. Just take each day one at a time. Don't think about that six-month deadline shit. Do you really think you'd divorce her?"

"No," I answer with zero hesitation.

"And what about her?"

"I don't think she would. I mean, anything could happen, but I really don't think she'd leave me. She wants this to work." I wish I felt as confident as I sound because, honestly, I just don't know if she'll stay with me if things keep going like this. She might say fuck it and take off with the fifty grand. I don't want to say that to Lukas, though. No one in the family knows about the money part except for my mom.

"Then don't even think about it. Just look at that part as getting out of this experiment and not having to talk to that therapist anymore about all your problems. That's all that's gonna change. Okay, buddy? Stop worrying."

"All right, man. Thanks for being there for me."

"Anytime. You know I got your back, cuz."

I end the call and go back in the house to find Asia. Lukas is right; we can't let this shit linger between us, so I'm going to confront it head on. I search the house, freaking out when I don't find her in the usual places. Maybe she left? She hates to drive, though. She would only get in the car if she absolutely had to, and I don't think she was
that
pissed off to subject herself to the evils of driving.

Finally, I find her downstairs in the laundry room, folding clothes.

"I thought you left," I tell her. "Don't disappear like that."

"I didn't disappear. I just came inside."

"Okay, then don't get up and walk away. I hate it."

"Fine."

I hate
fine
too.

I lean against the doorframe and cross my arms. "Look, I know you're mad that I forgot, and I'm sorry."

"I'm not mad, Talon. I'm upset."

"Either way, I'm sorry."

"So what about our honeymoon?"

Oops.

"I don't know. I didn't think of that—"

"You forgot we were supposed to go on a honeymoon?"

"Not really forgot, but I kinda didn't want to think about it too much. You only just let me fuck you like two seconds ago."

She stares at me with her mouth open. "I let you
fuck me
?"

Well, now she's upset
and
mad.

"I didn't mean it like that. That's just how I talk, and you know it. Don't pick at things just to make this worse."

"I'm not. But we're supposed to go on a honeymoon."

"I know that, but this is my job, Aze. I'm not going to fucking Disney World to hang out with Mickey."

"Can't you, like, reschedule or something?" she asks, bending over to pull more clothes out of the dryer, and my cock immediately wakes up as I stare at her perfect ass, imagining her bent over naked for me.

"No. Are you nuts? There's like thousands upon thousands of dollars invested. Tons of people have bought tickets. The shows are sold out. We can't just bail out of a twenty-day tour across the East Coast, babe."

"Well, I don't know how this stuff works."

"I know that. And you're off the hook—the guys decided no girlfriends or wives can come on the tour with us."

She stops folding and turns to me. "So I won't see you for twenty days?"

"Not unless you drive or fly to where I am for a day or two to be with me."
Please do that, my heart and cock beg.

She swallows hard, her jaw twitching, clearly not on board with that idea at all.

I shake my head with disappointment. "Yeah, I figured you wouldn't."

She takes her anger out on the sweater she's holding and folds it into a lopsided mess. "Maybe your old sexy model friend will be there to keep you company since your wife is too scared to trail around after you."

"Yeah, maybe she will." I take a few steps toward her and stand behind her, putting my arms on either side of her and resting my hands on the top of the dryer, trapping her. I lean my head down and press my lips against her ear. "Maybe you forgot that I only want you."

"You let her touch you right in front of me. I'm scared to think what you'll let her do if I'm not there." Her sarcastic tone is laced with jealousy and fear.

I press my rock-hard cock against her ass. "Not a fucking thing. Obviously, I haven't done a good enough job of showing you that every inch of me belongs to you now." I slide my hand down the front of her yoga pants, my fingers grazing over her lips, welcomed by a flood of wetness. "I think I'm gonna have to keep reminding you until you get it through your stubborn little head." I kiss her neck while pushing her pants and panties down and then quickly unbutton my jeans and pull my throbbing cock out. "Bend over and spread your legs for me so I can show you everything that's yours.
Only
yours."

"Bend over and spread…very romantic," she taunts, but she does it quickly, which only tells me she wants it as badly as I do.

I push my finger in and out of her while I suck on her neck. "I never claimed to be fuckin' Romeo, baby." I slide my cock into her slow at first, then thrust my full length into her, making her whimper and cry out as I stretch her to take me. Holding on to her hips, I rock into her for a few minutes before I reach around and rub her clit with my hand.

"You're driving me crazy," she pants, white-knuckling the edge of the dryer.

"Good. Now you know what it feels like."

"You can't tickle me or fuck me every time we have a fight."

Pulling out to the tip, I ram into her deep, making her go up on her toes. "I can, and I will." My gaze drifts down between us to watch my cock plunge in and out of her. "You feel so fucking good, baby. You're out of your mind if you think I'll ever touch another woman."