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Authors: Jennifer Crusie

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BOOK: Strange Bedpersons
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“Christine, rent a church,” Nick said without taking his eyes off Tess as she harangued Welch. “I’m getting married in two weeks.”

“It’s going to take you longer than that to talk her into it.” Christine picked up her steno pad. “Make it six weeks.”

“Let’s make this expensive.” Nick folded his arms and, ignoring Christine, watched Tess argue with Welch. “Might as well make it a big wedding and invite society. Should be good for the firm.”

“Tess will want a small wedding.” Christine made notes as she spoke. “Out of your house, not a church.”

“Fancy caterers,” Nick said. “Champagne fountains. The works.”

“Tess likes Chinese,” Christine said. “Rice wine. Fortune cookies.”

“And an orchestra.”

“It won’t fit in your house. Maybe a classical trio.”

Christine looked at Tess. “No. Tess would prefer jazz.”

Nick watched Tess’s rear suddenly curve as she bent to kiss Welch on the cheek. “Order a wedding dress, too. A tight one. No hoopskirts.”

“Tess will want to find her own.” Christine thought for a moment and made another note. “There’s a vintage-clothing store on Twelfth Street.”

Nick suddenly transferred his attention back to his secretary. “Did you get all that?” he asked.

“Yes,” Christine said serenely. “You can rely on me.”

Nick shot her a suspicious glance, but when she gazed back at him without expression, he turned his eyes back to Tess.

“This is going to be a great wedding,” he said.

Epilogue

 

Six weeks later, when the orchestra was finally gone from the poolside, Tess wandered through her house in the white crepe wedding dress she’d found at the vintage-clothing store on Twelfth, sipping champagne and contemplating her future. She moved through the rooms loving all the color that she and Nick had poured into the house over the past weeks and yet feeling a little melancholy. She was married now. She was respectable. Responsible.

She sat on the stairs and looked out at the pristine pool. Angela climbed into her lap, and she stroked the cat and sighed.

“Excuse me?” Nick said from behind her, and she turned to see him scowling at her through the stair rails. He was as beautiful as always, impeccably dressed in his tux, not a hair out of place. “You just got married,” he told her with mock severity. “You’re supposed to be in ecstasy. If you’re short on ecstasy, I’ve got a master bedroom you should see.”

“I know,” Tess said. “I’m the one who painted it yellow.”

“I don’t mind the yellow,” Nick said. “But did you have to paint the ceiling blue and glue on all those glow-in-the-dark stars? I turned the lights off last night and almost had a coronary when I rolled over.”

“Well, I figured I’d be spending a lot of time up there staring at it,” Tess said. “You know, on my back with the lights out.”

“I know there’s a message here I’m not getting,” Nick said.

“Now that I’m Mrs. Jekyll, I have to behave. Gina read me the riot act on this, and she’s right. No more risky sex.”

Nick started to laugh and then smothered it when he saw she was serious. “So now you’re planning on spending the rest of your life in the missionary position?” His grin broke through again.

“Hey,” Tess said. “I’m adapting. Give me a little credit.”

“I’d rather give you a wedding present.” Nick came around to the front of the stairs, took her hand and hauled her to her feet, dumping Angela to the floor in the process. “It’s in the dining room.”

“The dining room’s empty. We sold the table, remember? And then you refused to buy the red one I liked, so...” She followed him around the bottom of the stairs and then stopped, stunned.

The dining room was filled with the biggest grand piano she’d ever seen. And it was bright red.

Nick leaned against it. “I found it in a thrift shop, believe it or not.”

Tess walked toward it, her smile growing wider by the minute. “I don’t believe it.”

“Well, it was black when I found it,” Nick said. “I had it painted red. Like it?”

Tess stroked the lacquered red top as she slowly circled the piano. “I love it. Does it play the Minute Waltz?”

“Not unless you press the right keys,” Nick said. “This is a people piano.”

“I don’t play the piano,” Tess said.

“Neither do I.”

Tess stopped and looked back at him. “Then what are we going to do with a dining room full of a piano that neither one of us can play?”

“I was hoping you’d ask that.” Nick loosened his tie. “Let’s strike a blow for humanity.”

Tess was still laughing when he boosted her up onto the piano and climbed on top with her, rolling until he was under her.

“I love you,” Nick said as he pulled her close. “But if you ever turn into Mrs. Jekyll, I’m kicking you off this piano.”

“I knew you’d turn into a tyrant once I married you.” Tess straddled him and began to pop the studs from his shirt. “With you acting like this, how long do you think this marriage is going to last?”

Nick propped himself up on his elbows and met her eyes, and he wasn’t laughing anymore. “I think this marriage is going to last forever,” he said. “Is that all right with you?”

Tess caught her breath, suddenly swept up in the enormity of being married and the immensity of her love. “No,” she said, and then she leaned down into his arms. “Forever isn’t long enough. I’m going to love you longer than that.”

Nick wrapped his arms around her and closed his eyes for a moment. “Thank you for marrying me,” he said finally.

“Anytime,” Tess said. “Anytime, anyhow, anywhere.”

“Now and here, forever,” Nick said, and kissed her, and then they didn’t say anything at all.
* * * * *
Jennifer Crusie’s newest bestseller
is coming in hardcover
from St. Martin’s Press
in February 2004.
BET ME
Min thinks love is a fairy tale.
Cal thinks forever is a myth.
Fate thinks they’re meant for each other.
Put your money on Fate.

Jennifer Crusie became a romance writer after researching the structure of women’s writing for her Ph.D. in literature. Since that time she has written eight novels. In addition to her Ph.D., Jennifer holds a master’s degree in women’s studies in literature and professional writing, and a B.A. in art education. Jennifer manages to find time to write despite being an instructor in the English department at Ohio State University, a single mother to one daughter and the owner of four dogs and three cats.

BOOK: Strange Bedpersons
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