If I Can't Have You (If You Come Back To Me #3) (8 page)

“We Kavanaughs are rather…protective of one another. You know how family can be,” she said apologetically.

“I do,” he said in a hushed tone. “But I didn’t bring it up because I was looking for an apology.”

“No?”

He shook his head slowly. She couldn’t pull her gaze off the firm, shapely lips centered above the indentation of that cleft on his chin. “I brought it up because I wanted to ask you something…something I’ve wondered about.”

She stood frozen to the spot, even though she knew she should back away.

His dark head dipped slightly. His breath, warm and fragrant, brushed against her nose and lips. The subtle scent of his spicy aftershave filtered into her nose. She inhaled, greedy for it.

“Do you regret that kiss?” he asked.

For a stretched few seconds, neither spoke. The silence was absolute. Colleen wondered if they both held their breath.

“I keep
trying
to regret it but—”

She never finished her sentence, because he leaned down and closed the distance between them, seizing her mouth with his. One second she’d been Eric-less, and the next she was submerged in him, overwhelmed by the feeling of his demanding lips and singular taste. She stumbled in her boots. In fact, she later wondered with rising horror if she hadn’t
swooned
. He caught her, holding her firmly in his arms.

But what woman
wouldn’t
be caught off balance—and thrilled by her dizziness—while being consumed by Eric Reyes?

She went up on her tiptoes and pressed against his long, lean body, her prickly nerve endings in need of pressure…sensation. It was if she’d been starving all this time and hadn’t recognized her state of deprivation until now. He must have felt her desire, because he tightened his hands around her arms, pulling her closer still. His agile tongue demanded entry and she granted it, all too eager for his taste. He staked his claim, sweeping his tongue everywhere, exploring her. It thrilled her—his size, his strength. She wasn’t used to feeling so small next to a man, so feminine in comparison.

One of his hands trailed up her arm, opened along the side of her neck in a thoroughly possessive gesture, devouring her all the while, making her hot…dizzy. The next thing she knew, his mouth was moving, awakening her nerve endings along her jaw and then her neck.

“You taste good enough to eat,” he whispered roughly before he increased her shivers by placing a kiss on her ear. His ravishment of her throat continued. Colleen struggled to stand…to think.

In a remote part of her brain, she also recognized that he’d been restraining himself on Sunset Beach. Coming into contact with the full extent of his desire had her spinning.

“Eric…please…I don’t think…such a good idea,” she mumbled incoherently. Even as she attempted her lame protest, however, her actions told another story. Her hand found a way to his head. She held his mouth against her neck, delving her fingers into his thick, wavy hair.

He groaned when she scraped her fingernails against his scalp. He tightened his hold and pulled her higher and more firmly against him. Colleen gasped at the sensation of her breasts sliding along his chest. She twisted slightly against him, rubbing, needful of the friction his hard flesh offered her. He went still for a moment, his hot mouth at the base of her neck.

He lifted his hand from her shoulder, and Colleen heard the snick of the lock on the door.

Her eyes sprang open. The sound had been tiny, but full of meaning—charged, incendiary…illicit. She pushed against his chest and shoved out of his arms.

For a good five seconds, they stood there, both of them breathing heavily, several feet of space separating them. As the spell of his touch slowly faded, anger rushed in to take its place.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing, locking that door?” she grated out.

He arched one brow sardonically, the expression telling her loud and clear that the answer was obvious.

She smoothed her shirt and took another step away from him. Not even her rising fury over what had just occurred could make her totally immune to the fact that Eric looked damn attractive at that moment. Her stroking fingers had mussed his hair. Several dark locks fell sexily onto his forehead.

And that wasn’t all. His aroused state was shockingly—thrillingly—obvious, and he didn’t appear to be in any haste to hide that fact from her.

The realization sent her into a tailspin. She was angry, true, but also bewildered by the strength of her response to him. She wanted Eric Reyes.
Eric Reyes
. She didn’t
want
to want him, but her body seemed to be ignoring her wishes.

“I suppose this is some kind of ritual for you, to bring women to your office on your lunch hour,” she said in a low, shaking voice. She reached to unfasten the lock.

“Always running, aren’t you, Colleen? I always pegged you for having more courage than that.”

Her hand dropped, and she spun to face him. “You ask me up to your office on a pretense and then take advantage of the situation and maul me. I choose to leave, and you claim that’s running?” she said in a shaky voice.

He regarded her somberly. If it weren’t for his mussed hair, smoky eyes and…
agitated
state, it might have been the return of the indomitable, arrogant Dr. Reyes. Seeing both aspects of his character in evidence—the cool, arrogant side alongside the hot, impassioned male—intrigued Colleen despite her irritation.

“If you want to leave, that’s your prerogative, of course. I don’t think it’s me you’re running from, though. Not me....or my ‘mauling’ of your body,” he added darkly.

Colleen flushed. He was right to chastise her for that mauling comment. If that had been mauling, then she was just as guilty for returning the favor.

“You’re running because of the way you feel,” he continued. “Why are you so determined to deny that we’re attracted to each other?”

She rolled her eyes and released the lock. “The attraction would have to be a heck of a lot stronger than that for me to ever get involved with you,” she said coldly, despite the fact that she was hot.

Very hot.

“Oh,” he said, his head going back slightly as if he’d just caught her meaning. “A kiss has to be a lot better than that for the princess to be interested. I get it.”

Her cheeks burned at his sarcasm. If his kiss had been any hotter, she might have spontaneously combusted. And he knew from experience how furious she became about that stupid “princess” reference.

“I’m not going to stand here and praise your sexual prowess, Reyes. I’m
not
interested. Now, do you want to play Dr. Don Juan, or do you want to plan this party and wedding with me?”

He dropped his arms and walked toward his desk. “I’m definitely going to be in on the plans. This is my sister we’re talking about.”

“Fine,” she said, her anger fizzling slightly at his refusal to fight with her. “Just…just keep your distance from me. This is family business only.”

He paused behind his desk and met her stare across the room.

“I’ll only get as close as what’s required. I promise.”

She nodded her head once in agreement and fled the room and was halfway down the hall before she realized the ambiguity of his solemn pledge.

Chapter Four

M
ari Kavanaugh bustled into Colleen’s kitchen, her high heels tapping briskly on the tile floor. The sounds of the band Eric had hired for the engagement party filtered through the swinging doors. Luckily, the event had fallen on a gorgeous fall evening. Colleen’s terrace and family room had been transformed by a colorful silk pavilion, with lush autumn flower arrangements, glowing lanterns and flickering tea lights. Three giant heat lamps, donated by Eric, kept the terrace comfortable, and everyone seemed to be having a good time. Before she’d entered the kitchen a few minutes ago, Liam and Natalie had been the first to begin dancing.

Colleen had watched Liam and his fiancée dance, smiling wistfully just like every other guest at the party. The couple’s love and desire for each other had been so evident it created an ache in Colleen’s chest.

Her gaze had shifted when a tall figure moved into her line of sight. Colleen had watched a smiling Janice Tejada swaying in Eric Reyes’s arms. Her sappy smile had evaporated.

She’d headed to the kitchen and began attacking a particularly grimy saucepan.

“We need more sweet-and-sour sauce,” Mari said breathlessly as she flung open the refrigerator door. “The Asian dumplings are a big hit. I can’t figure out how you’re such a fabulous cook when your brother’s idea of culinary preparation is dialing for takeout.”

Her sister-in-law looked sophisticated and typically beautiful tonight, wearing a rust-colored dress and brown suede pumps. Colleen had been friends with Mari since they were in elementary school. They hadn’t seen one another for fifteen years following the car crash, in which Mari’s parents and Colleen’s father had all been killed. Mari and Colleen had immediately connected again when Mari returned to Harbor Town, however. Colleen had been thrilled to see that Marc and Mari’s passion for one another had burned brighter than ever. She
wasn’t
a romantic, but it had seemed nothing but right in Mari and Marc’s case when the star-crossed lovers finally got their happily ever after.

Mari kicked the refrigerator door shut and paused when she saw what Colleen was doing.

“Colleen, don’t! Let the assistant Marc hired clean up. I can’t believe you’re doing dishes in that gorgeous dress,” Mari scolded.

“Amanda is busy serving. Besides, I needed something to do.”

Mari gave her a concerned glance. “Is everything all right? You seem preoccupied. All this party and wedding planning has been too much for you, hasn’t it? Especially after all you did for Marc’s and my wedding.”

“I’m not too busy. I swear. I enjoy it,” she insisted when she saw Mari’s doubtful glance.

“I feel terrible. I’m Natalie’s matron of honor, and Marc is Liam’s best man, but you and Eric have been doing the lion’s share of the work. It’s not fair.”

“It hasn’t been difficult at all. Eric and I are here in town, and you’re not. Mom has been helping out, as well. Here, stir it up before you serve it,” Colleen directed, handing Mari a whisk for the sauce.

“I was surprised to hear Eric has been so involved in the planning,” Mari said as she gave Colleen a sideways, speculative glance. “Hasn’t that been…challenging for you?”

In truth, she
had
been spending too much time in Eric’s presence lately. She’d been spending too much time
thinking
about Eric lately. Being forced into his company as they planned the upcoming nuptials had been both annoying and…stimulating.

“The two of you have always been like oil and water,” Mari added.

“Or a lit fuse and dynamite?”

Mari chuckled. “I remember how worried I was about both of you working at The Family Center.”

“I can’t imagine why. Did it have anything to do with the fact that I slugged him in the parking lot of Jake’s Place a few days before you hired me?” Colleen muttered wryly.

Mari paused and leaned her hip against the counter, a curious expression on her face. “You know, I always wondered about that. I’ve never known you to act that way. I mean, emotions were certainly running high that night. But while you’ve always had a temper, I’ve never known you to get physical. Why
does
Eric bother you so much?”

Colleen scrubbed at the pan extra hard. It was a good question, and she wasn’t sure how much she should reveal. Mari didn’t know that she and Eric had kissed on Sunset Beach just weeks before she’d punched him in a whirlwind of fury and bewilderment.

“He’s insufferable,” she said.

Mari laughed and picked up the ladle. “You’re the only person on the planet who thinks so. Most women adore him. He’s smart, he’s handsome, he’s charming, he’s great with kids. If I recall correctly,” Mari said, giving Colleen a sly glance, “you were right there like the rest of us when we were teenagers, waiting for Eric to take off his shirt while he worked for that landscaping company. You did your fair share of drooling whenever he did, too.”

Colleen snorted with laughter. Their mirth was interrupted by the sound of the music getting louder and the squeak of the swinging door. Both women glanced around, but Mari recovered at the sight of Eric faster than Colleen.

“Hey.” Mari greeted him with a grin. “We were just talking about you. You and Colleen should be proud. The party is a huge success.”

Colleen’s wide grin faded as her gaze ran down Eric’s body. He looked beyond good, wearing a dark blue suit that set off the width of his shoulders and trim hips. His dress shirt seemed appealingly white next to his bronzed skin. His hair looked almost black against the contrast of his collar.

When he’d come over earlier to help prepare for the party, her heart had seemed to jerk in her chest. Had he always been so handsome? She’d known he was good-looking, of course. Most women in Harbor Town knew that. But the intensity of his attractiveness, his sheer sexual potency, seemed to have escaped her until now.

Or it had until that kiss last summer.

“Liam and Natalie
were
having a terrific time,” Eric said.

Colleen set down the dish towel and smoothed her dress over her hips, trying to ignore the fact that Eric’s gaze flickered downward, following the path of her hands. “What do you mean?” she asked, concerned.

“It’s Tony Tejada and Janice,” he told her. For the first time, she realized his jaw looked tense. “Tony didn’t take to me dancing with Janice very well.”

“Eric, you didn’t—” Colleen began in a rush, suspicious that he’d “tweaked” events a little too stringently in order to make his precious point about the foolishness of impulsive romance and marriage.

“Oh, no—” Mari muttered at the same time Colleen spoke, but both of them were cut off as Tony stormed into the kitchen. He was about a head and a half shorter than Eric, but he had the muscular build of a one-time athlete. Eric met his angry gaze levelly.

“I would prefer it if you kept your hands off my wife,” Tony said aggressively.

“Your
ex-wife
is my friend and coworker. And we were just dancing. If you don’t want to see Janice in someone else’s arms, I suggest you ask her to dance yourself.” Given Tony’s agitation, Colleen couldn’t help but respect Eric’s cool, even response. Eric turned his dark-eyed gaze to her.

“Actually, I came looking for you,” he told Colleen before Tony could utter another word.

“Uh…you did?” Colleen noticed Tony’s neck had turned brick-red above his collar as he glared at Eric.

“Yes.” He held out a hand toward her. “Come and dance with me.”

Colleen wavered, confused by the turn of events. Tony looked furiously flummoxed, Mari appeared amused and Eric just stood there, his face completely impassive, his arm stretched toward her in a beckoning gesture.

“Er…okay,” she muttered gracelessly. Dancing with Eric would separate him and Tony, which Colleen thought was a pretty darn good idea at the moment. When she placed her hand in his, he immediately swept her into his arms. He moved her gracefully out of the kitchen and beyond the patio and the pavilion until they were beneath the star-spangled, ebony dome of the night sky. The brisk autumn air felt nice against her heated skin.

Natalie and Liam and several other couples were also swaying to the jazz music, but they remained beneath the silk pavilion, closer to the patio doors. Colleen fleetingly noticed Natalie’s pinched expression of concern as she glanced at her brother. Had Natalie noticed Tony Tejada’s anger?

“Is it your mission in life to make trouble wherever you go?” Colleen hissed. Eric hadn’t touched her since that kiss in his office nine days ago. He’d been nothing but polite and businesslike as they planned the engagement party together. She’d convinced herself she was glad he hadn’t tried to touch her again…or kiss her…

She’d hadn’t entirely convinced herself, apparently. The heat and pressure of his hand resting on her hip was making her breathless.

He leaned back slightly and looked into her face. “A dance is trouble?”

“Not
this
dance,” Colleen grated out, trying to ignore the sensation of his flat belly, pelvis and thighs brushing against her own. “I’m talking about the fact that you were flirting with Janice while you danced. You
knew
Tony was watching. You were putting your little plan into place…plotting. I thought you said you weren’t going to do anything malicious to make your point,” she said accusingly and with the deepest of sarcasm.

His dark brows rose. “I wasn’t plotting. That happened all of its own accord. And I wasn’t
flirting
.”

Colleen made a disgusted noise. “I was watching. You were so flirting.”

“You were?” Eric asked, his question confusing her. He moved the hand on her hip to the middle of her back and pushed her slightly toward him. The contact between their bodies increased. Her breasts brushed against the lapel of his suit jacket, making her breath catch in her throat.

Colleen glanced up instinctively into his face. In her heels, her eye level was just above his mouth.

“I…I was…
what?
”

“Watching me?” he clarified while she studied his lips moving. When she realized what she was doing, her gaze zipped up to meet his.

“Not everyone is watching you,” she said, exasperated.

He chuckled. “I wasn’t asking about everyone,” he replied, smiling in the face of her sarcasm.

As usual.

Before she could give him a blistering response, the music swelled and he spun and dipped her expertly. She laughed in surprised delight when he spun her again. She was suddenly back swaying in his arms, neither of them missing a beat.

“Where did an ex-hockey player learn moves like that?” she asked, still grinning.

“Dancing with the Stars?”
he asked.

She gave him a
give me a break
look, and he chuckled.

“I had a girlfriend in college who loved dancing. We took a few lessons together.”

“Hmm… Well, I suppose it makes sense that you’re a good dancer. Natalie’s brilliant. You two must have gotten good genes. So, what happened to the girlfriend?”

He looked puzzled.

“The dancing one,” Colleen clarified.

“Oh.” He shrugged, the movement of his jacket sliding against her body causing her breasts to tingle. Had he just pulled her subtly closer?

“It was college. Time to experiment a little. Didn’t you date a lot in college?”

“No. I started dating Darin my sophomore year.”

“And you were only with him until you were married?”

“Yes,” Colleen replied a little sharply. In truth, Darin had been the
only
man she’d ever been with. “What’s wrong with that? Are you so anti romance that you don’t believe young people can fall in love and remain faithful to one another?”

“I’m at a loss as to when I’ve given you the impression I’m anti romance. I can assure you, I’m very much on the pro side.”

She just stared for a second, her mouth slightly open. His voice had gone husky. She blinked and willed herself to look into her backyard.

“You mean that you’re on the pro side in regard to sex. I’d hardly call that romance,” she said coolly.

“Really? That’s a shame.”

She gave him a withering glance, which bounced right off him.

“I don’t consider sex to be a casual matter in the slightest,” he murmured.

“I can imagine if I did a survey of the women you’ve dated recently, they might disagree.”

Colleen’s eyes widened when he lowered his chin and brushed it against her temple. His breath felt warm near her ear. “I doubt any one of those women would tell you I was anything but completely serious and focused when it comes to that particular topic.”

“Well,
I
would have to be interested in order to ask one of them. Which I’m not.”

“No?”

“Not even close,” she assured him.

“Are you implying that you’re not interested in the topic in general?” he asked without missing a beat, leaning back to study her face. “Or just in regard to me?”

Colleen laughed. She couldn’t help it. He looked completely earnest, like he was asking a professor for clarification on a puzzling math problem.