Read Correlated Online

Authors: Shaun Gallagher

Correlated (15 page)

BOOK: Correlated
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Sleep Position

55%
of people consider themselves to be patriotic.

But among those who aren't side sleepers,
72%
consider themselves to be patriotic.

----------------

35%
of people think that a person should disclose that they are a widow/widower in their online dating profile.

But among those who aren't side sleepers,
48%
think that a person should disclose that they are a widow/widower in their online dating profile.

----------------

56%
of people are more interested in football than foosball.

But among those who aren't side sleepers,
68%
are more interested in football than foosball.

DOUBLE PLAY

You're extremely likely to not be a side sleeper if you both:

  • assume that those without Facebook accounts are weird
  • prefer a horizontal tire swing rather than a vertical tire swing
NO CORRELATION

People who aren't side sleepers are almost exactly as likely as the average person to:

  • have deployed a fire extinguisher
  • prefer fame over fortune
  • have dimples
Smokers

67%
of people have excellent credit.

But among those who smoke, only
36%
people have excellent credit.

----------------

42%
of people have had a poison ivy rash.

But among those who smoke,
70%
have had a poison ivy rash.

----------------

41%
of people prefer Reese's Pieces to M&M's.

But among those who smoke,
66%
prefer Reese's Pieces to M&M's.

DOUBLE PLAY

You're extremely likely to be a smoker if you both:

  • are considered the black sheep of your family
  • think Halloween is more fun when you're of legal drinking age than when you're a kid
NO CORRELATION

Smokers are almost exactly as likely as the average person to:

  • suffer from canker sores
  • prefer a cologne/perfume that evokes spring
  • say their left hand does most of the work when they applaud
Sneaking In

56%
of people never spill things on their keyboard.

But among those who have sneaked into a movie without paying,
75%
never spill things on their keyboard.

----------------

40%
of people have ridden a pogo stick.

But among those who have sneaked into a movie without paying,
59%
have ridden a pogo stick.

----------------

80%
of people would rather work four 10-hour shifts a week than five 8-hour shifts.

But among those who have sneaked into a movie without paying,
91%
would rather work four 10-hour shifts a week than five 8-hour shifts.

DOUBLE PLAY

You're extremely likely to have sneaked into a movie without paying if you both:

  • have been on a bar crawl
  • root for Wile E. Coyote over the Road Runner
NO CORRELATION

People who have sneaked into a movie without paying are almost exactly as likely as the average person to:

  • think Holocaust denial should be illegal
  • have been attacked by zombies
  • tend to use dashes rather than slashes to delimit dates (for example, mm-dd-yy)
Soda vs. Pop

29%
of people own tie-dyed clothing.

But among those who call cola “pop” rather than “soda,” only
12%
own tie-dyed clothing.

----------------

63%
of people say they are more familiar with Play-Doh than Plato.

But among those who call cola “pop” rather than “soda,”
77%
say they are more familiar with Play-Doh than Plato.

----------------

46%
of people say they have a tendency to push their luck.

But among those who call cola “pop” rather than “soda,” only
34%
say they have a tendency to push their luck.

DOUBLE PLAY

You're extremely likely to call cola “pop” rather than “soda” if you both:

  • like lamb
  • prefer some other kind of bread besides white
NO CORRELATION

People who call cola “pop” rather than “soda” are almost exactly as likely as the average person to:

  • not know how to make a PowerPoint presentation
  • predominantly chew on the left side of their mouth
  • dine out frequently
South Park
vs.
The Simpsons

37%
of people would rather save up for an extravagant vacation than do a series of several more modest mini vacations.

But among those who prefer
South Park
to
The Simpsons
,
58%
would rather save up for an extravagant vacation than do a series of several more modest mini vacations.

----------------

66%
of people say they're more likely to become vegetarian for health reasons than ethical reasons.

But among those who prefer
South Park
to
The Simpsons
,
80%
say they're more likely to become vegetarian for health reasons than ethical reasons.

----------------

40%
of people have ridden a pogo stick.

But among those who prefer
South Park
to
The Simpsons
,
53%
have ridden a pogo stick.

DOUBLE PLAY

You're extremely likely to prefer
South Park
over
The Simpsons
if you both:

  • think it'd be fun to have an identical twin
  • would prefer to be corporeal, rather than incorporeal, if you could be invisible for a day
NO CORRELATION

People who prefer
South Park
to
The Simpsons
are almost exactly as likely as the average person to:

  • prefer limp greens in their salad
  • eat their chocolate bunnies ears-first
  • prefer their corn off the cob
Speeding Tickets

67%
of people aren't members of warehouse clubs.

But among those who have never gotten a speeding ticket,
79%
aren't members of warehouse clubs.

----------------

63%
of people are fans of Penn & Teller.

But among those who have never gotten a speeding ticket, only
52%
are fans of Penn & Teller.

----------------

56%
of people say their primary alarm clock is their phone.

But among those who have never gotten a speeding ticket,
67%
say their primary alarm clock is their phone.

DOUBLE PLAY

You're extremely likely to have never gotten a speeding ticket if you both:

  • have never changed careers
  • prefer that the open end of your pillowcase face the inside of the bed
NO CORRELATION

People who have never gotten a speeding ticket are almost exactly as likely as the average person to:

  • dislike oregano
  • like science fiction
  • understand the word
    conception
    to mean fertilization
Spelling

55%
of people consider themselves to be patriotic.

But among those who don't spell well,
71%
consider themselves to be patriotic.

----------------

38%
of people ascend the stairs two at a time.

But among those who don't spell well,
53%
ascend the stairs two at a time.

----------------

29%
of people think of soup as only a cold-weather food.

But among those who don't spell well,
45%
think of soup as only a cold-weather food.

DOUBLE PLAY

You're extremely likely to be a poor speller if you both:

  • are fluent in only one language
  • have never been prescribed a powerful painkiller
NO CORRELATION

People who don't spell well are almost exactly as likely as the average person to:

  • like their current bank
  • prefer leather couches over fabric couches
  • say they can tolerate annoying people when it's in their own interest to do so
Spicy Food

26%
of people prefer white beans to black beans.

But among those who don't like spicy food,
43%
prefer white beans.

----------------

51%
of people have never carved a turkey.

But among those who don't like spicy food,
67%
have never carved a turkey.

----------------

58%
of people have bad posture.

But among those who don't like spicy food,
73%
have bad posture.

DOUBLE PLAY

You're extremely likely to not like spicy food if you both:

  • don't regularly exercise
  • are not adept at using chopsticks
NO CORRELATION

People who don't like spicy food are almost exactly as likely as the average person to:

  • think redheads are fascinating
  • like warm milk
  • prefer dodge ball over kickball
Spiders vs. Snakes

73%
of people are college graduates.

But among those who are more scared of spiders than snakes, only
62%
are college graduates.

----------------

58%
of people prefer reptiles to amphibians.

But among those who are more scared of spiders than snakes,
68%
prefer reptiles to amphibians.

----------------

55%
of people use the phrase
a couple
only when referring to exactly two of something.

But among those who are more scared of spiders than snakes,
64%
use the phrase
a couple
only when referring to exactly two of something.

DOUBLE PLAY

You're extremely likely to be more scared of spiders than snakes if you both:

  • prefer
    Star Trek
    to
    Star Wars
  • have seen all three Lord of the Rings movies
NO CORRELATION

People who are more scared of spiders than snakes are almost exactly as likely as the average person to:

  • have a hard time with
    who
    vs.
    whom
  • say the person who most intimidates them is a woman
  • say that if they had the opportunity to find out, they would want to know the date on which they will die
Step-Parents

53%
of people have seen a therapist.

But among those who have step-parents,
71%
have seen a therapist.

----------------

22%
of people say their favorite cereal brand is Kellogg's.

But among those who have step-parents, only
8%
say their favorite cereal brand is Kellogg's.

----------------

41%
of people would rather get a congratulatory stamp than a sticker.

But among those who have step-parents,
53%
would rather get a congratulatory stamp than a sticker.

DOUBLE PLAY

You're extremely likely to have stepparents if you both:

  • have worked in restaurants and bars
  • tend to choose tails in a coin toss
NO CORRELATION

People who have stepparents are almost exactly as likely as the average person to:

  • prefer the Summer Olympics over the Winter Olympics
  • think flag burning should be legal
  • own iPods/iPads
Stringed Instruments

27%
of people can play the piano.

But among those who can play a stringed instrument,
47%
can play the piano.

----------------

38%
of people like heavy metal.

But among those who can play a stringed instrument,
50%
like heavy metal.

----------------

69%
of people prefer original music with unfamiliar songs to cover bands with familiar songs.

But among those who can play a stringed instrument,
80%
prefer original music with unfamiliar songs to cover bands with familiar songs.

DOUBLE PLAY

You're extremely likely to be able to play a stringed instrument if you both:

  • would rather be blind than deaf
  • enjoy camping
NO CORRELATION

People who can play a stringed instrument are almost exactly as likely as the average person to:

  • prefer the radio/music alarm clock setting over the buzzer setting
  • have sinus issues
  • have taken a graduate-level admissions test
BOOK: Correlated
7.74Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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