Awakening the Wolf (11 page)

“Illiana?”

She flicked her tongue along the top of his hand and was surprised that he did not pull it away.
“It’s me. Can you understand me?”

“I can understand you. H-how did you do that?”

“It’s part of who I am. My father was two-natured. My mother kept it from me all my life, and I just figured out what I was capable of doing. That was part of what you saw when you were spying on me. I was learning how to contact the other side and control my ability to communicate with the fire element. I was half in transition when you saw me the other night.”
Illiana nudged him with her nose and licked his cheek. She willed herself to human form and donned her clothes. It took her a moment before she turned around. Part of her figured Belik would have left, and she also dreaded that realization. After a moment, she turned and found Belik had not run off. She knelt before him.

“Not running away screaming yet?” She studied her hands, not able to meet his gaze.

He took her hands and pressed his lips to them. Illiana glanced up and saw the happiness in his eyes and the awe. The way he peered at her made her all tingly inside. “I’m not running away. I find it quite stimulating. You’re something more special than I could’ve ever imagined. It may take me a while to get used to your other shape, but I understand why you have such an affinity for the wolves. Maybe that’s why you can’t get Christopher out of your system.”

“Maybe. I don’t know. I can’t tell you why he has me so wound up. None of this makes you uncomfortable?”

Belik shook his head. “Not in the least. It’d be nice if I could get you that wound up. I understand why you were training for the priesthood. The flock would not understand your unique abilities. It only makes you all the more desirable to me.” He leaned forward and kissed her gently, probing her lips with his tongue until she opened her mouth and touched her tongue with his.

Illiana wrapped her arms around him, feeling at ease with the complete acceptance of his yielding body against hers. Belik wound his tongue around hers. He touched her lightly, then drew her even closer. She inhaled his scent and found it was a mixture of cedar and cinnamon. His body was muscled under his robes—in the wiry way the rest of the flock was—but it did not matter to her. Having someone who held her and accepted her for who she was, was more than she had ever had from anyone. He kissed her a little deeper until their tongues were entwined, and she pushed into him a little more. Before she knew it, Illiana had fallen on top of Belik. He landed on his back with his head dunking underneath the water. She scrambled off him and helped him up. When she grabbed his arm, he hauled her into the pond. Illiana tried to maintain her balance, but the ground was uneven and she lost her footing. Together they ended up completely drenched and immersed in. Illiana stood up and had a lily pad attached to her. She tried to pull it off, but Belik got to it first. He threw it back into the water, and she started laughing. She began sloshing through the water, back to shore, only turning to notice that Belik flashed her a devilish smile. Then he chased after her.

Illiana let out a squeal and ran away from him, but he did not give up. They ran around the pool and the clearing until he almost had her. Illiana dodged him and hid behind a tree. She tried to catch her breath. When she peeked out from behind the tree, she could not see him. It was as though he had completely disappeared.

“Where did you go?” she asked.

His laughter filled the clearing. “Are you going to find me?”

She shook her head and chuckled. This was a game she had played with Christopher when they were teenagers. Illiana had always been better at it than him. The wind moved over her fingers and across her body. It had an excitement to it that she normally did not sense. Even it was getting into the hunt. Illiana closed her eyes and listened to the air. The way it moved, she could sense things in the environment around her. Its currents gave her an image of the trees it caressed and the blades of grass it wound through, even the insects buzzing in the air. It even showed her whether something was out of place in the environment. She opened her eyes and snuck around to the back of the poplar tree, where she found Belik. Illiana wrapped her hands around his waist.

“Gotcha!”

He turned and smiled at her. “That was too easy. How’d you find me?”

She put a finger to her lips. “I’m not telling. You already know too many of my secrets.”

Belik moved the hair from her face and ran his fingers along her cheek as if trying to memorize her features. The sincerity and the longing in his eyes made her wonder how she had become so lucky. Of all the times she had yearned for Christopher to hold her and tell her that he cared for her or found her beautiful, Belik was the one doing it instead. “Well, when you’re ready to tell me, I’m sure you will.”

Her heart swelled at the idea of what would happen between them. Maybe with him she could find a place in the flock. The wolf side of her was not happy with the idea of letting her feelings for Christopher fade away. Not having him in her life stabbed her soul. They were meant to be together. Now she had to convince Christopher of that. But she forced that thought from her mind and focused on being with Belik. His arms were warm and inviting. Illiana could envision a life with him. The raven part of her accepted him for a potential mate, and that was a good thing. Among their clan they mated for life. “You are too good to me. More than you should be. I—”

“My, my, it looks like we’re interrupting something.”

Illiana froze from that familiar voice. Belik’s grip tightened. He must have seen her shocked expression because he squeezed her waist. He pulled her closed to hide her from the wolf behind them. She buried her head in his shoulder, but she could not hide forever.

“Don’t worry about it. I can make him go away if you want to stay here,” he whispered in her ear.

She shook her head and felt her heart sink even lower when she heard a laugh next to Christopher. Jalisa. The very thought of her made her wolf growl, and she wanted to rip the other woman apart. “No, I have to face him sometime.”

“If he says one thing that hurts your feelings, I don’t care what our relationship is with the wolves.”

She touched Belik’s arm. “No. Don’t do anything you’ll regret. It’ll be okay.”

“Oh, look, Christopher. It’s a couple of bird brains,” Jalisa sneered.

Illiana cringed as she heard those words, and Belik grumbled. She clasped his arm and brushed a kiss along his cheek. He had stiffened and was going to pounce on the both of them.

“What? Cat got your tongue?” Jalisa taunted them.

“Leave them alone. It’s obvious they don’t want to be bothered,” Christopher added.

“You’re correct. We weren’t looking to be bothered.” Illiana stepped out from behind Belik. The shock of it hit Christopher’s eyes first. His eyes widened, and his mouth dropped open.

“Il-Illiana, what are you doing here?” His face paled as he tried to regain his composure. He stepped away from Jalisa and moved closer to her and Belik. Jalisa frowned at Christopher but kept her mouth shut.

“Hello, Christopher. I’m here with Belik. We’re getting to know one another.” Illiana felt Belik slide a hand around her waist.

He squeezed her and stepped close enough she felt his body heat blasting against her back. Christopher bared his teeth, and a low growl came from his lips. Illiana tried to hide her surprise at the territorial show. It did appear that he cared about her even if he did not want to fully admit it to himself. Jalisa glanced at her, and she saw the murderous look lingering in her eyes. If they had been alone, she figured Jalisa would be going for her throat. A surge of excitement rolled through Illiana because she knew she could take the bitch before her. With that knowledge, she drew herself up a little straighter. Christopher looked at her for a long time before he spoke. The silence was uncomfortable. So many questions swirled through her mind she did not know what to ask first or what she should ask with the others so close by.

“Illiana, can I talk to you?” Christopher glanced at Belik and Jalisa. “Alone, please.”

“Is that a good idea?” Belik asked her.

She turned and saw the concern and trepidation in his eyes. She smiled, reassuringly. “It’s fine. If it’s okay with you.”

Belik smiled. “It’s not him I’m worried about.”

“Why do you want to talk to her alone?” Jalisa demanded.

Christopher shot her a look. “Do as I say, and
be
nice.”

Jalisa snapped her mouth shut, and Illiana suppressed a smirk. It was nice to see that someone could get her to clam up. Christopher glanced at her, waiting for Illiana to follow him. Her heart hammered in her chest, and she tried to slow it because she was sure that Christopher could hear. Having him so close and not being able to tell him that she had visited him the night before in wolf form gnawed at her. She took a deep breath and walked behind Christopher until they were out of earshot. Then he stopped and cornered her.

“What the hell are you doing with that-that bird?” Christopher inquired, but she could hear the edge in his voice.

“What do you mean? I’m getting to know one of my own kind.” She crossed her arms over her chest.

“And when did you get to know another raven? I thought all of those birds shunned you.”

“What do you expect after what you said to me? Telling me I was nothing, less than nothing, and you couldn’t stand to be around me,” she yelled and felt tears burn her eyes.

He raked his fingers through his blond hair and glanced up at the sky, not able to meet her gaze. When he finally did, Illiana saw that his eyes were glistening with unshed tears. “I-I feel horrible about the things I said. You’ve always been my friend, but the night of your initiation . . . I don’t know . . . I saw you that night, and something clicked. I wanted you. I realized how I felt about you. I’ve always wanted you. . . . ”

“If you’ve always wanted me, then why did you say those horrible things? I thought you were my friend. Then you shred all those years and in one swoop you tell me I’m not good enough for you. Do you know how that hurt me? You were the only person who I could trust. Who I ever cared about more than my family. You accepted me for who I was, and then . . . poof!” Her tears slipped down her cheeks, and she did not bother to wipe them away so he could see them.

Christopher winced and cleared her tears away. His gentle touch on her cheek made her melt. Her heart slowed, but the hurt in her soul had been grated over again, and she was reliving all of what had happened to her. He hesitated and then drew her into his arms. She inhaled his masculine scent, smelled the earthly aroma of the wolf that she had never picked up on before. It made him all the more tantalizing. She did feel completely right in his arms the way she was when she was in Belik’s arms. Both parts of her, the wolf and the raven, were satisfied with the different men. He kissed the top of her forehead and lifted her chin so that she could stare into his blue-gray eyes. Christopher pressed his lips to hers in a long kiss that was slow at first.
Oh, boy, does he have a soft mouth.
It made her weak in the knees until he was holding her up. Her nerves tingled with pleasure, and she was instantly wet from the animal attraction that flared within her. Illiana pressed herself close to his body, molding hers to it, until his fingers raked along her back and grabbed her ass. She plunged her tongue into his mouth and waited for him to pull away. But he didn’t. Instead Christopher held her closer and groaned. She slid her fingers along his muscled back and felt the skin roll as if he were fighting the change. He met her tongue so that they wrestled and wrapped around one another until he broke free to nip along her jaw and neck. Christopher threaded his fingers through her hair, and each place his lips touched burned, branding into her. It fanned the fire inside of her and worked into her blood, burning her soul. The air stirred around her in an attempt to calm her until it blew so violently she could feel it trying to lift her and Christopher up. She had never had that happen before. Both elements reveled in her passion.

Illiana moaned and tried to come back to herself, but the more she tried, the more she realized she was losing control, too. The wolf was ready for her to give over to it. Now would not be the time to do that. If he found out, how would he react?

“Christopher, we have to stop this.”

He nibbled on her ear. “Why? We both want this. I need you in my life.”

“If you need me so much, then why are you mating Jalisa?”

“The same reason you’re with the raven. We can’t be together. My father would never accept our mating. You live in the tress. I live on the ground. Your mother would never allow me. I wouldn’t know what to do among the trees.”

“So Jalisa is your ideal mate? She’s such a bitch.”

“She has her good moments, and her family is powerful. The mating would be a good alliance among the packs.” He sighed and brushed a piece of hair away from Illiana’s face. “I don’t expect you to forgive me for what I said. I realized once I said it, it would push you away. I prayed my feelings for you would die, but they didn’t. I’m sorry. Jalisa and your man would never truly understand how we feel about one another. We’ve always been raised to marry within our kind. Dammit! Why couldn’t this be easier?”

She nodded.
If only it could be
. “What if I was a wolf?”

“That’d be a miracle, and it would solve a lot of problems. Nevertheless, you’re not, and we can’t do this. We both have to forget how we feel for one another.”

“I know. That is the reason I’m getting to know Belik. He’s a good man.”

“I’m happy for you. I really hope it works out.” Christopher stepped away from her, and she felt the distance spreading between them. That thought stabbed her heart, but she knew this was how it had to be done. At least for now.

“Oh, I wanted to tell you I’ve seen this strange black wolf in the forest. I didn’t recognize it. Anyone new come into the pack recently?” Illiana asked.

He flashed her a questioning look. “It’s strange you say that. The other night I had a glimpse of the wolf you’re talking about. It was odd.”